September 2, 2004
52 weeks
Total pounds lost: 48
Pounds lost since last report: -7
 
Aaaaaah… summertime and the weather was fine, but July and August reminded me how easy it is to slip back into “the old ways” of eating.
 
June’s healthy moderation became a bit less healthy and a bit less moderate in July, but I still managed to finish the month without gaining any weight.  I even treated myself to a Louis Vuitton bag during a short trip to Las Vegas (this month’s picture) to celebrate my weight loss to date.  August, however, was a different story.  I could feel the panic creeping in when I checked the academic calendar and realized summer was going to be a week shorter than my past two school years.  Already feeling the pressure of all the things I’d planned to get done over the summer but didn’t, coupled with the pressure inherent in starting back-to-school preparations a week earlier than expected, I began spiraling into a mild depression – not a good state of mind for weight loss.  Another problem I faced was constantly having to forego yoga class for other commitments.  Bottom line: my bottom got bigger by seven pounds – ugh!  So much for fitting into all my cute clothes for back-to-school!
 
I’ve been in class three days now, and I’m already getting slammed by the homework.  But the upside is that I’m getting back into a routine, and I am SO READY to start having my food delivered to me again.  While I’m disappointed in ending my “summer of free will” a net two pounds heavier than when I started (remember I lost five pounds in June), it’s not the end of the world.  In fact, I have to say I’m rather thrilled to begin my second year a solid 48 pounds lighter than when I started back-to-school last year.
 
Until next month,
 
Phoenix

June 26, 2004 Diary Entry:
Weeks on the Zone Gourmet Plan: 41 weeks (10 months)
Total pounds lost: 55
Pounds lost since last month: 5

Yes, I really am as happy as this month's picture!  After May's disappointing plateau, I spent several days contemplating a hiatus from my beloved Zone Gourmet home delivery. Contemplation turned quickly into fretting as I considered the idea of really stepping out on my own: the freedom of choosing what to eat combined with the fear of making my customarily crappy choices. Would nine months of Zone Gourmet translate into being a better eater on my own?  Up until now, going off-program was mostly tied to celebration eating and travel eating - two categories that hardly mimic real-life, everyday eating - and never for longer than a few days at a time.  Finally my mind was made up: I arranged to go it alone until school starts again in September.  Let the games begin!

I went a little crazy my first week off the Zone as I went to visit my in-laws in Arizona: alcohol, pasta, and bread being among my favorite indulgences.  But I also found that as long as I ate a decent breakfast, I wasn’t really all that hungry, so my portions remained within the ever-so-important concept of moderation.  I was worried about weighing in after that first week, but was pleasantly surprised with a 3 pound weight loss.  (Pleasantly surprised?  Who am I kidding  I almost fell off the scale - I was so happy!)  The rest of the month has been filled with trips to the fair (translate that as cheese on a stick), the Scottish Highland Games (bangers, anyone), movie after movie after movie (can you say popcorn after popcorn after popcorn), Father’s Day (hello, pasta), and my birthday.  My parents took me out for my ultimate birthday fantasy lunch - a Monte Cristo sandwich at Disneyland’s Blue Bayou - which makes this months’ picture of me and my folks on my 44th birthday.  At month’s end - in spite of all my foodaholic indulgences - I’d lost a full 5 pounds, bringing my total to 55 pounds. Yes, the land of moderation has allowed me to eat whatever the heck I felt like this month and still lose weight - a concept I really didn’t believe was possible until 9 months of Zone Gourmet showed me what a real portion size is supposed to look like (a far cry from Mickey D’s Super Size, or just about anything served anywhere in this beloved country of ours.)  A bite of this, a taste of that, and my every food fantasy can be indulged without the bulge.

Will July confirm June’s result  Or is there some other diet-destroying eating compulsion waiting to take over my body  

Fingers crossed,

This month I decided to stop weighing myself every week, figuring I'd take the whole "down a pound, up a pound" frustration out of the equation - after all there hasn't been a month where I didn't lose weight, right  But wouldn't you know that whole concept would blow up in my face when I gleefully stepped onto the scale yesterday - a full twenty-seven days since I last took that gingerly little step - and I weighed EXACTLY the same as twenty-seven days ago. 

I have no recollection of the moments immediately following that little "beep" sound the scale makes when it's finished with its assessment, but I may have actually screamed.  The unfairness of it all!  This is the month I finally became fully committed to exercise - actual, hard, aerobic exercise - ramping up from two days a week to three days a week to five days a week this month (which became possible after school let out.)  I've been VERY careful not to overindulge when not sticking to my Zone Gourmet diet.  I've been a good, darn it!

I've now had twenty-four hours to make peace with that loathsome instrument of the devil, and I'm feeling pretty good about it.  I recalled something Dr. Phil said last summer about how you can control what goes into your mouth and how much you exercise, but you can't control what the scale says.  In spite of those words of wisdom (or maybe to confirm them) I went out and bought another scale, just to see what it had to say - but it made me three pounds heavier (I'll be taking it back today.)  

Since I have no weight loss to brag about this month, I decided to take a look at the other numbers I have available to me, just to see if there was anything outstanding to share.  Turns out the Zone Gourmet web site asked for just a couple of Zone-pertinent measurements when I started the program: waist (45 inches), hips (50 inches), and wrist (6.5 inches). 

I measured myself again this morning and was pleasantly surprised to find these numbers have changed rather significantly (I know, I know, I'm like ten sizes smaller already, but I hadn't physically measured these changes before today - it's exciting): waist (34 inches, I've lost 11 inches), hips (43 inches, I've lost 7 inches), and wrist (6 inches, down a half an inch).  It also turns out that my body fat percentage, which I couldn't measure until I'd already been eating Zone Gourmet for almost three months (I didn't have the right kind of scale), started out at 45.8%, and yesterday it was down to 40.2%; I've actually "traded in" 5.6% of my weight in body fat for lean muscle mass. 

Analyzing that a little bit… when I started on Zone Gourmet, I weighed 218 pounds, which at 45.8% body fat means I was 118 pounds muscle and 100 pounds fat.  Today I weigh 168 pounds with 40.2% body fat, which translates as 100 pounds muscle and 68 pounds fat.  So of the 50 pounds I have lost so far, about 32 pounds is actual fat; I've been losing the fat at nearly double the rate I've been losing muscle!

I don't know about you, but I can't wait to see what happens in another month - and I don't care what the scale says!

Phoenix

I did it! I did it! I did it! My new exercise regimen paid off: I lost 5 pounds in April and finally reached the elusive 50 pound mark! Yippee! I'm half way to my goal of 100 pounds gone.

April was definitely a banner month: I went down another pant size mid-month, and am now wearing a couple of size tens (I had size 20 pants when this journey began.) Some of my medium t-shirts are getting too big (I wore 2X last September.) But as fantastic as the pay-off of going down in sizes is, I realized something way more significant this month: I'm no longer invisible. I'm no longer one of the fat women walking around campus, or the zoo, or Disneyland (this month's picture) that nobody notices: too fat to be attractive, not fat enough to be remarkable for my obesity. Now guys in stores don't just ask if I need help, they flirt with me. Guys at school are suddenly saying hi when I pass. I'm turning heads in the mall. It's as if I was traveling around in stealth mode all this time and somebody (I guess that would be me) finally turned it off. Not that I live for having a stranger make a pass at me, but hey, after going to hell and back, it's fun to repatriate to the land of the normal where men and women actually notice each other. The clincher was when a very young, very cute colleague from my first semester of chemistry saw me walking across campus yesterday (April 28th) and spontaneously blurted out, Hey sexy, don't you look gorgeous! while standing with a group of his friends.Ê (Susan had predicted the 28th as a jewel of a day for Cancers like me and gave it three wows. I never realized how literal her readings could be!) It just doesn't get any better than that.

I could not be happier with the help Zone Gourmet is giving me in letting go the "cloak of invisibility," and I have to thank Susan (and her staff) for their generosity in letting me share my experience with you and putting it on-line.

'Til next month,
Phoenix

April 2004
Week 28:

Another month and another two pounds gone for good! I finally began an exercise program last week -- kind of a jazz dance/exercise class using the latest dance music, which I love. I've committed to twice a week to start, but homework limited me to once a week during my first two weeks, and travel next week will do the same (Susan's prediction of lots of travel for Cancers this year has been right on, as always!) It's really hard for me to think of exercise as a necessity like brushing my teeth or paying my bills, but I really want (make that NEED) to get this facet of my "new me" program going. It's one thing to be overweight when your skin is straining to hold everything in place, but quite another to lose a significant amount (45 pounds and counting) and start to feel parts jiggling that didn't used to and what's up with that growing flap under my neck --- eegads!

Phoenix

January 2004
Week 19:

January caught me off-guard. I expected the holidays would be the toughest, so January's break from classes, leisure travel, and friendly get-togethers found me "relaxing" my diet more than in the previous four months combined. The good news is I still came through four pounds lighter - a forty pound weight loss (and another milestone) in just five months! My new buzzword is focus. As long as I go into situations with a modicum of forethought, and stay focused on the bigger picture, I can enjoy every situation where eating is involved, in moderation. Still, I'm really happy to be starting back to class, re-establishing my exercise routine, and enjoying my Zone Gourmet deliveries!

I decided that the best photo I could send this month is my car filled with fifteen bags of clothes that I donated to a local battered women's shelter. I tried on every single piece of clothing I owned, and if it was even a little bit too big... out it went! It was a slight bummer to find those "skinny" clothing items I'd been saving for the next time I lost ten or fifteen pounds, only to discover I'd missed the chance to wear them. I just whizzed right on past the opportunity to wear that too-small sweatshirt I'd bought as a souvenir at the Celtic dance festival, or that too tight blouse that was such a pretty shade of pink. But for every "bummer," there was something else from the too-tight clothing archives that suddenly looked fabulous! I finally cut the tags off the Paul Frank juniors t-shirt I bought two years ago - it fits!

More thrilling than the act of closet excavation, was taking my clothes over to Serenity House. I didn't get to meet any of the women who would become the recipients of my donation, (confidentiality can be a matter of life and death at a women's shelter), but the women in charge of the organization couldn't have been more appreciative to receive the clothes on their clients' behalf. They lamented how often they receive donations of small-sized clothing, when the reality is that the women they work with are frequently plus-size. I couldn't have scripted a more perfect conclusion to this chapter of my weight loss program: the joy of cleaning out my closet was definitely eclipsed by the joy of giving my clothes to women who really need them.

I know my weight loss has been in the range of 1-2 pounds per week - a rate most experts agree is good for permanent weight loss, but it feels like I'm shrinking in size much faster than I'm shrinking on the scale. Whenever I buy a pair of pants now, I'm buying them a little on the tight side so I can get more wear out of them, and I'm buying the next size down at the same time. This way my wardrobe has continuity and I have that next-smaller pair of pants to try on each week to gauge my progress. (Is there a more exciting moment than zipping up a pair of pants you couldn't pull up over your rear-end the month before? I think not!) I'm wearing size 12 pants this month (buying the 10's as back-up) and size medium tops (with smalls as back up.) With 60 more pounds to lose, I'm starting to wonder if they make clothes small enough for the new me?!?

Phoenix

December 19, 2003
15 Weeks

With Thanksgiving and the holiday parties nearly over with, imagine how thrilling it was to get on the scale this morning and find another two pounds had gone missing! Fifteen weeks in and I've lost 32 pounds. A high point this past month was going in for a nice relaxing read at my local Barnes and Noble café after a three-month hiatus - I practically lived there over the summer - and watching the cashier's jaw drop when she recognized me. It's great when your family and friends notice your weight loss, but nothing beats having a stranger notice how great you look!

Getting through the holidays has been easier than I expected. While I didn't eat one mouthful that wasn't brought to me by Zone Gourmet for the first eight weeks or so, the holidays have forced me to think outside the “box” and deal with several meals that weren't delivered. Portion size seems to be the key to keeping the weight loss momentum going, so when I've eaten off-program, my main goal has been to mimic the amount of food I would've eaten on-program; basically I'm substituting quantities, which has worked like a charm. Again, I have to credit the expense of the program with helping me to stay focused - goodness knows I don't want to add an extra pound that I will have to work to take off again later - I just haven't seen anything I wanted to eat badly enough to be worth it! I've got several more off-program meals coming up, but I'm feeling confident that I'm going to wind up the holidays thinner than I started. I'll keep you posted.

Phoenix

November 21, 2003
11 Weeks

After 11 weeks on Zone Gourmet, I've lost 26 pounds, 3 inches from my waist, and 4 inches from my hips. I've gone from size 18 to size 14. I just bought a scale that measures the body fat, so I don't know where I started, but at 11 weeks, I'm at 45.8%. I'm figuring I have between 70 and 90 pounds still to lose, which would put me between 102 and 122 pounds when I'm through. I've been doing yoga three times per week (1 hour per), with some walking thrown in for good measure when I have time. Over the next month, I'm going to add my Pilates machine workout and get more serious with the walking.

Phoenix

October 31, 2003
8 Weeks

Dear Susan:

I just wanted to thank you for recommending Zone Gourmet, and let you know that I’ve lost 22 pounds so far in my first two months on it.

In the past year I’ve become a full-time student (literature and Biology dual major), and I’m working on becoming an author, as well. My husband died five years ago of hemophilia-related AIDS, and it looks like my memoir “Devil’s Potion: A Wicked Love Story” will probably be sold the first quarter of 2004 (publication 2005 or 2006.) You can be sure that twenty years of HIV and AIDS, and sickness, and death, and widowhood haven’t been good for my weight.

I’d been thinking about trying another home delivery service when I read your comments about Zone Gourmet at the end of my September horoscope, so I decided to try it. It has been a godsend - like having my own personal chef! All thought about eating has been removed, which as a food addict, seems to be the only way I can lose weight.

I live in California where my food is delivered fresh daily. I feel like a movie star when I retrieve my fresh gourmet food from my doorstep - usually just before I go to bed. An added bonus is that I’ve been to the grocery store just once in the past two months (to buy bottled water), so I’ve even avoided the whole picket line issue here.

Like you, I was also doing Atkins (independently) before Zone Gourmet and it took me about eight days to stop feeling hungry and get used to the portion sizes (and the lack of Diet Coke - I was addicted to that, too.) Now, some mornings I have to struggle to eat my whole breakfast - it’s so huge!

I’m 5'4" and I weighed 218 lbs. when I started. I weigh myself on Friday mornings and at eight weeks I weighed in at 196 - a 22 lb. loss! I don't really have a set goal weight because the last time I weighed anything close to normal I was 25, but now I'm 43. I've never been skinny - even at 115 I had heavy legs - so I'm just playing it by ear. When I started, I was thinking I had 100 lbs. to lose, and it will probably be somewhere in that range when I feel right.

I must admit that a big part of what is working about this diet (besides that it's easy and fabulous) is the expense: I'm actually thinking about what it's costing me per pound to lose it this time. I can't think of a Krispy Kreme without thinking that they might cost me $1,000 worth of weight loss - it's the best appetite suppressant I've ever used! (Besides, the Zone Gourmet cheesecake is to die for - who needs anything else?)

I've got a long way to go, but I don't see any obstacle now to finally becoming the thin person I am inside.

Your thankful and thinner reader,

Phoenix